Whingeing Clegg

Nick Clegg as just finished his speech to the Lib Dem faithful in Liverpool.

Walking around the stage (a lot) without notes, Clegg managed at least to prove his eyesight was excellent, reading his speech off a 60-inch plasma autocue at the back of the auditorium.

The speech, although better than most Lib Dem leader speeches, was unfortunately filled to the brim with scaremongering rhetoric. And then there was the whingeing... and whining... and moaning... it went on and on and on.

He threw his dummy out of the pram while he promised to continue to walk out of the Commons; he stamped his feet while he promised to continue to abstain; he thcweemed and thcweemed and thcweemed while he promised to not go to meetings or dinners that he didn't agree with.

Apparently, the Lib Dems are taking a long holiday and going to do absolutely nothing at all. Not much difference there then.

So to their policies - and aren't they different from those tyrannical Labour people and the "sham" politics of the Conservatives?

From what I heard the Lib Dems are going to:

1) Cut VAT on fruit juice that mostly contains more sugar than normal Coca-Cola
2) Decentralise control over hospitals (have I heard that one before? Oh, yes, from the Conservatives)
3) A Derek Conway clause to allow local people to vote to get rid of their MP if they're suspended (not a bad idea but can we do that with a government as well, say, every 6 months?)
3) Invest in children's education

The last one was a peach, as it was for children's eduction that he (and I quote) "will find the £2.5 billion it will cost". Bless. And this was the man who called Conservative policies a sham.

Clegg wants to tax "only what we need and not a penny more". Apart from the obvious back track on their penny on taxes campaign at the last election, the U-turn leaves me thinking that the Lib Dems want this country run as a charity. Sorry to have to tell you, Nick, but UK plc needs to make a profit and the books are well into the red at the moment.

And as for all the "Now this is the time for change" and "The chance for change is there... within our reach... it's ours to take... so let's seize it."

Could all political speechwriters please close the book on Obama speeches, once and for all?!